Just the other day, someone asked me which city I consider home. It really set me thinking about all the cities where I spent some time of significance – Delhi of course but also Chennai, Hyderabad and Kolkata. But Delhi has to be home, not because it is a city that I love (which is far from true) or because I have lived there the longest here – 48 of my 60 years in this world. But also because this is a city where I made my first friends. Specifically, 2 of them who I have known for over 50 years and am still very much in touch with.
The first is Praveen Rattan Nayyar urf Viny. My first recollection of Praveen was in class 2 which, if my memory serves me right, was in 1963. The school was Maulana Azad Road Childrens’ School in central Delhi which was the precursor to the now better-known Army Public School. It was a school for children of army (defence services?) officers. I know I have one of those class photos lying around where we are both there!
I certainly remember Praveen as a friend but I don’t remember what we did together then other than hang around each other during school breaks, maybe sharing our sandwiches – at least those that were not snatched away by kites that swooped on us from the sky with frightening accuracy, reminding us of the Stuka dive bombers of World War II fame. We both moved school soon after – he to Scindia School in Gwalior and I to St. Columba’s School in Delhi. I have vague memories of our writing to each other – the only real means of communications in those days – but I am not sure. I think Praveen’s dad – who like mine was in the Army – moved to Ahmedabad and we lost touch.
But not for long because come mid-1973 we found ourselves in IIT Delhi, both pursuing a degree in mechanical engineering. Those were good days and though Praveen didn’t stay in the hostel like I did – his home was at nearby Safdarjung Enclave and he had a mo’bike – we hung around together in classes and tutorial groups. Then in 1975, my parents decided I should transfer to IIT Madras – as an 18-year old, I had no role to play in that decision but I have to say that I had a great time there – and so we lost touch again. I then finished from IIT, worked for a couple of years in Hyderabad and Kolkata and joined IIMC while Praveen worked for a year post IITD and joined IIMA.
In 1982, I joined the consulting firm A F Ferguson & Co and guess who I run into there – Praveen Rattan Nayyar! So, we again hung around together for a bit before Praveen decided to head to the US to do a PhD etc. and he is currently a professor of strategy at NYU’s Stern School of Business. We remain in touch (the modern way now through email and WhatsApp), meet up when we can – over dinner in New York on March 2016 and as recently as January 4th, we spoke on WhatsApp! Praveen is for sure the one guy I have remained in touch with for over 50 years – 55 years actually!
The other long-but-not-lost friend of 51 years is Rajeev Varma urf Raju. Raju and I met in 1966 when we moved into Central Vista Hostel where he lived opposite our place. Technically, I have also known his siblings Sanju, Pammo and Neelima for as long but I guess Raju and I have more shared memories. Interestingly, one of the kids at Central Vista was Praveen “Bubbly” Bakshi who was on track to become Chief of Army Staff but was, sadly, superseded!
Raju and I were in different schools and so it was the post-school activities that we shared. Those were good days – Central Vista Hostel was a safe space in times that were also very safe. The routine was that we would return from school, have lunch, finish homework and go to “play”. And play was whatever was the game of the season – cricket in winter, football and hockey in summer, badminton. We even tried playing baseball using a tennis racquet! Summer holidays was swimming.
Then there were these trips Shankar Market to Ram Gopal Sharma who ran a lending library where we borrowed Commando comics, that gave birth to our eternal interest in the romantic side of World War II (and motivated me to visit some of these sites in The Netherlands in October 2017, much to the bewilderment of my friend Nelleke who I stayed with). That was the time that Raju and I decided to become where we cut “blood brothers” our fingers with a blade and mixed our bloods, inspired by 2 characters in our beloved Commando comics!
Raju and I played off each other in so many ways. When my brother Sriram and I joined tennis coaching at National Stadium, Raju followed. Raju introduced me to the world of body-building; he convinced his mom to buy him a “Bullworker”, a strange device with tubes and springs, and many evening were spent pumping them – to little avail in my case, I might add. We also saw my first adult movie together before we hit 18 – I think it was Dirty Harry at Plaza – where we used our mothers’ kajal pencils to paint side-burns and a moustache; it was a really pathetic attempt and I am sure the usher let us in because he was rolling on the floor laughing! I also think we had our first smoke together but I must admit I am very hazy about this! There were also things we didn’t share – Raju loved to shoot pigeons with his air-gun and his willing partner-in-crime was my brother Sriram who also loved for the gore and the unusual, while Sanju and I preferred the more non-violent activities.
Raju’s family moved out of Central Vista and also went our separate ways when it came to college – he did Political Science from Hindu College in Delhi while I went to IIT – first Delhi and then Madras. But we stayed in touch, meeting up ever so often at our homes or outside, including getting his large coterie of cousins to provide safe spaces for drinking beer. Raju then joined the army and was posted at different places, but we stayed in touch. When my wife Sandhya and I wanted to get a formal marriage certificate, which required a gazetted officer to make the trek to Tis Hazari courts and sign some papers, Raju was the automatic choice.
We recently reached the 60th year of our existence on this earth – Raju a tad before me – and Raju and Sanju came over. We are now planning a driving holiday to Ladhakh, our first one together? Looking forward to it!
January 2018